My previous blog post had informed everyone at the end that I was starting fourth year of college this year a.k.a my final year. Those of you who know me or are in touch are probably aware that I took a year out nearly 2 years ago because of my poor mental health at the time. The thought of going back into final year of college after a year break is certainly daunting but I figured I’d share my experience so far.
The biggest lesson I’ve learnt is it’s never too late; I’ll admit when I first arrived, my confidence wasn’t at its highest in terms of writing skills (since I’m doing a degree in Journalism). It took a little while finding my feet hence there was a two-month break from my previous post! To be honest, that was expected really and I’m not kicking myself about not writing because fourth year has been pretty damn time-consuming. However, magically I have managed to stay above my deadlines and the support from my family and friends through this trying year has been amazing.
What I’ve oddly noticed is that the omen of fourth year is just stress. Stakes appear much higher and the work seems more excessive. Yet, I’m somehow meeting deadlines so what’s confusing to me is why am I stressing? It nearly feels like the Leaving Certificate again with people asking me what do I want to do after college.
It’s funny because maybe over a year ago, I didn’t even expect to be here so I guess calculating what I was going to be doing was never in the cards. Further employment seemed to be this crazy notion to even think about but I’m realising it’s not. It’s the next step for me and my future to do something I enjoy. I’ve spent so much time overthinking and trying to meet my own ridiculously high expectations that I forgot my abilities and my capabilities.
So I guess what I’m trying to say is that fourth year is hard, there’s no doubt about that. However, it’s exciting at the same time because this is the end of an era. I’ve been watching my friends who graduated last year and they’re doing so many wonderful things – they’re travelling, they work in a really cool job or they’re moving across seas for a little while to discover something different.
So if you’re frightened about fourth year, there is little reason to be. Just stay focused and everything will fall into place.